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Random Reviews

We started this page to share some of the one off random reviews that we have received from readers. We don't call it Random for nothing. Enjoy.

Announcing

Random Reader Review: 101 Building (Taipei, Taiwan)
101 is the world's tallest building (debatable) and as such should have some nice facilities. I really liked the surroundings (marble and dark wood [wood being synthetic of course]). Overall very nice, privacy was well desgined but at times it is full causing you to hear other crappers. Taiwanese people (men at least) often cough, dry hack, or clear their throats which can get a little disgusting. However the facilities are very nice overall.

UserFriendliness : 4
Cleanliness : 5
Privacy : 4
Facilities : 5
OverallScore : 5
Handicrapping : Yes
Attendant : No


Announcing

Random Reader Review: 24/7 Store (Abilene, KS)
There's cockroaches everywhere and sh*t on all the stalls and piss all over their toilet seat and floor!!

UserFriendliness : 0
Cleanliness : 0
Privacy : 0
Facilities : 1
OverallScore : 0


Announcing

Random Reader Review: Locke School (Chicago, IL)
Poopie was on the wall of the bathroom. So disgusting. After a week it turned blackish and smelly.

UserFriendliness : 3
Cleanliness : 2
Privacy : 2
Facilities : 4
OverallScore : 4
Handicrapping : No
Attendant : No

 

Camp Grounds at NASCAR Race (Martinsville, VA)

I'd like to tell you about what me and my friends refer to as the Jeff Gordon Grab Bag. There is a hill at the race track in Martinsville. People camp out there and enjoy the whole weekend. Drinking, partying, grilling, and one row of Porta-Potties, over a 1/4 of a mile away. Well one night after some serious drinking JB had to go, and I mean bad. The problem was he was stupified with alcohol, and he couldn't walk that far. So he did the next best thing...dropped trough, held onto the side of his truck bed and leaned back. He was 100 yards or so from our camp site, so we didn't care. The next morning someone thought enough of it to place a pile of paper towels over it as a warning of a land mine. It worked great...UNTIL night came and someone stepped on it, slipped (reminder, we were on a large incline) and got their Jeff Gordon shirt covered in poo. Hence a hilarious story to tell, and the name of it...The Jeff Gordon Grab Bag! (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 2
Cleanliness = 1
Privacy = 0
Facilities = 0
Overall Rating = 1


Hut (Philippines, Island of Luzon)

i was on my way to a lovely little resort in the philippines with my family, when all of a sudden it hit me... you know, the unstoppable force. unfortunately, we had an hour or two to go before reaching our destination. when i could hold it no longer i whispered to my mommy (i was less than 10, and yet i remember it so vividly) that i really had to go. so my uncle stopped the car right in front of a grouping of hut like homes in the middle of a bunch of pineapple fields. i really wanted my mommy to accompany me to ask the nice people if i, the little white skinned girl which they will remember forever (my dad is an american, i was there visiting my mom's family) if i could kindly use their toilet, if they had one. but, due to my mother's fear of cats and the fact that there was a huge one roaming about, my ninang had to take me. so, after asking the lady i hopped onto their very high toilet. it was clean enough, considering the circumstances. usually i would have assumed the squat position but the damn thing was too high. so i lined it with toilet paper, perched my "puet" (tagalog for butt) on there and did my business. when i thought the ordeal was finally over, i went to flush but it didnt work. i faintly remembered my mom and aunts telling me before we embarked upon our fateful trip that if, anywhere in the phils, the toilet doesnt flush, put water in it. but i had no idea what the in the hell they were talking about. so i did nothing (i would later look back and realize that pouring water into the bowl would manually flush it)so, the moral of the story is when in a hut, and the damn thing will not dispose of the evidence, use the nearest "tabo" (a plastic bowl with a handel used for washing the rear... found in every filipino home, so dont worry... it will be there)and just wash that poo away. but preferably, dont doo doo in a hut. plus, if you're white, they will remember you even more... you guys aren't common out there! (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 1
Cleanliness = 2
Privacy = 2
Facilities = 0
Overall Rating = 1


Suncoast Haven Of Rest Rescue Mission (Pinellas Park, FL)

They wave a shower and give away free clothing if you have had an "accident." (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 4
Cleanliness = 4
Privacy = 2
Facilities = 3
Overall Rating = 3


The Roxy (Portland, OR)

Ew...just avoid it if you can. (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 1
Cleanliness = 0
Privacy = 2
Facilities = 1
Overall Rating = 1


Jimmy Johns (Columbia, MO)

Lovely, quiet setting for a good crap. Clean and fresh smelling. (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 3
Cleanliness = 3
Privacy = 4
Facilities = 3
Overall Rating = 3


Co-op Gas Station (Outlook, Saskatchewan)

Not the cleanest washroom on the planet - and it doesn't smell too good either. On the other hand it is large, has a locking door and is indoors. The sanitary (and ick) factor is high for women, though, as this is a combined m/f bathroom and has a less-than-clean urinal right out in the open beside the sink where you wash your hands. (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 4
Cleanliness = 2
Privacy = 4
Facilities = 2
Overall Rating = 2.5


Gertrude's Motel (Unknown)

Good while it lasted. (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 5
Cleanliness = 5
Privacy = 5
Facilities = 5
Overall Rating = 3


BJ's Shopping Club (La Jolla, CA)

(submitted by CQ Reader)


User Friendliness = 2
Cleanliness = 2
Privacy = 4
Facilities = 3
Overall Rating = 2


Harrah's Casino (Kansas City, MO)


Ante up! The privacy rating is high due to the availability of a second row of stalls on a wall behind the first row. I went back there and was all to myself. The stalls are kind of snug, but the TP is right at hand level. Plenty of stalls, no rush! I hate public restrooms, but this was clean enough to play poker on. Definately a Royal Flush. (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 4
Cleanliness = 4
Privacy = 5
Facilities = 4
Overall Rating = 4


Basketball Gym Locker Room
(Kingston Springs, TN)


Pretty good for a school. (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 3
Cleanliness = 4
Privacy = 2
Facilities = 3
Overall Rating = 3


Mobil Station (Skokie, IL)

Located just east of the Edens Expressway. This Mobil station is owned by a nice older couple. The Mrs. really decked out the standard gas station bathroom with peach wallpaper, coordinating wallpaper border, lovely flower arrangements - it just gives you the impression of doing the deed at home. Very clean and inviting. (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 5
Cleanliness = 5
Privacy = 5
Facilities = 5
Overall Rating = 5


Lycoming Mall (Hughsville, PA)


The best sh*tter I ever visited. (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 5
Cleanliness = 5
Privacy = 5
Facilities = 5
Overall Rating = 5


Neshannock High School (Newcastle, PA)


Gym teacher's private office toilet. This is the only toilet besides my own at home that I would use on a regular basis. I am not a public shitter by trade, however, this bathroom was IMMACULATE. It was clean, it had it's own lock, and was located in an office and the office was in a locker room. And Mr. Bowen always provided the few people he ever let shit in there with more than adequate reading materials...Good Show Mr. B! I say your bathroom is the finest of any high school west of the Mississippi. (Editor's Note: Last time we checked, Pennsylvania was still east of the Mississippi River.) (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 5
Cleanliness = 5
Privacy = 5
Facilities = 5
Overall Rating = 5


Trolley Square (Salt Lake City, UT)

The restroom in the Trolley Square mall in downtown Salt Lake City, Utah is pretty much somewhere to be used for emergencies only. I have stopped in here on occasion because of an emergency situation that needed to be rectified, only to discover that half of the toilets were clogged up, had piss on the seats, or water on the floor (probably from a clogged toilet). The management obviously does not care about the cleanliness of their restrooms here. There's not much in the way or privacy either. Stay away unless you really cannot wait. (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 2
Cleanliness = 1
Privacy = 2
Facilities = 2
Overall Rating = 1


Sholi Tabuchi Theater (Branson, MO)


The king of thrones... in the men's crapper, you can finish up a good turd by playing a little pool. Catch a nap on the lavish accomodations. You'll never want to leave these awesome crappers. (submitted by CQ Reader)

User Friendliness = 5
Cleanliness = 5
Privacy = 4
Facilities = 5
Overall Rating = 5


River Valley Mall (Lancaster, OH)


This bathroon is very convienently located in our mall and has plenty of stalls for all of our crapping needs! (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 4
Cleanliness: 3
Privacy: 5
Facilities: 4
OverallScore: 4


Buc-ees on I-10, Exit 635 (Luling, TX)


Buc-ee's advertising claims they have "Fabulous Restrooms" and they're right. Large stalls ... clean ... even hand sanitizer dispensers in each stall! I've never found myself in need of paper; there's always enough! (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 5
Cleanliness: 5
Privacy: 5
Facilities: 5
OverallScore: 5


Sturgis Hall - Henderson State University (Arkadelphia, AR)


Excellent place to shit... It really does a wonder for your mind to relax there! (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 5
Cleanliness: 5
Privacy: 5
Facilities: 5
OverallScore: 5


Bryant Denny Stadium - South End Zone at the Student Section Entrance (Tuscaloosa, AL)

Too much beer the night before the game. I told my date I was going to get a hot dog, and when she asked why it took so long I said the line was long! (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 1
Cleanliness: 0
Privacy: 0
Facilities: 0
OverallScore: 1


Battery Park Bistro (Ashville, NC)

(submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 4
Cleanliness: 5
Privacy: 3
Facilities: 5
OverallScore: 4


Royal York Hotel (Toronto, Canada)

The stalls are actually individual little rooms with a real door that stretches from floor to ceiling. Includes marble finish and most importantly, an automatic motion-sensored flusher. (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 4
Cleanliness: 3
Privacy: 4
Facilities: 4
OverallScore: 4


Costco (Winnipeg, Canada)

Very clean, and good supply of ass gaskets. (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 4
Cleanliness: 5
Privacy: 3
Facilities: 4
OverallScore: 5


Ten Brook Tavern (Arnold, MO)

It was so dirty I pooped in the holding tank. (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 1
Cleanliness: 0
Privacy: 5
Facilities: 1
OverallScore: 0


Route 13/250 (Fitchville, OH)

Unbelievable. It was a glorified outhouse. I only used it because I ate some bad broccoli. No lock on the door and it was basically a toilet seat over a hole of shit. (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 1
Cleanliness: 2
Privacy: 0
Facilities: 0
OverallScore: 1


Cal. State Auto Parts (Anahiem, CA)

Private restroom for employees only. (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 1
Cleanliness: 4
Privacy: 1
Facilities: 4
OverallScore: 3


Beacon Hill Tavern (Summit, NJ)

This is a very cramped crapper. And it's the only crapper for 50+ men that could be in the bar/retaurant at a given time. There is a lock on the door, so you don't have to worry about intruders. But long lines easily form with in minutes, so you don't want to run into a jam and have to resort to using this most cramped of crappers. If you feel like you might have a stomach problem, I advise getting off your bar stool and start heading towards a restaurant around the corner called "The Office". (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 1
Cleanliness: 3
Privacy: 0
Facilities: 3
OverallScore: 2


Gunn High School (Palo Alto, CA)

I had to go to the restroom during one of my classes and the closest restroom was in a portable. They featured classic Crane fixtures, but there was a horrid smell! And sometimes, the toilets would not be flushed! Only go here if you ABSOLUTELY need to! (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 1
Cleanliness: 1
Privacy: 3
Facilities: 1
OverallScore: 1


Home Depot (Webster, TX)

Unfortunatly the only way to keep this place clean with their caliber of customers, is a complete cleanout every 15 minutes. I feel sorry for the poor bastards that work there! (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 2
Cleanliness: 1
Privacy: 3
Facilities: 3
OverallScore: 1


Dillards Wolfchase Customer Svc (Memphis, TN)

Possibly the nicest public Crapper in Memphis. Definitely one of the cleanest I've used! (submitted by CQ Reader)

UserFriendliness: 3
Cleanliness: 4
Privacy: 4
Facilities: 3
OverallScore: 4

city=Riverton, Kansas
country=USA
location=Quick stop-only one in town
cleanliness=5
privacy=5
userfriendliness=4
overallscore=4
comments=Surgically clean restroom


city=Gainesville, Georgia
country=USA
location=Ryan's
cleanliness=0
privacy=1
userfriendliness=0
overallscore=0
comments=Disgusting. No toilet paper ever, urine, feces, and blood on each and every one of the toilets, not to mention the floor. Obviously the janitorial staff there doesn't realise the inconvenience of a nasty crapper.


city=Mahomet, Illinois
country=USA
location=Handicaped Restroom Next To Orange Gym in Junior High
cleanliness=4
privacy=5
userfriendliness=4
overallscore=5
comments=Wonderful before bball practice



>city=Valencia (Los Angeles) CA
>country=USA
>location=Six Flags Magic Mountain
>cleanliness=1
>privacy=1
>userfriendliness=1
>overallscore=1
>comments=First off I'd like to vent. I paid $48.00 just to get in my sorry butt in the door at Magic Mountain. Meanwhile there were at least 100,000 snot-nosed little gang-bangers that were getting in for five bucks and an empty Pepsi can. Anyhow, after signing over the mortgage to these jerk-offs I was directed to pass through a security checkpoint. I've had lap dances that were less intimate. But enough of that... on to the crapper story.

Once inside the gate I felt the urge, so I headed (no pun intended) to the "Guest Relations" building expecting they would have better than average accommodations. What I found was a single American Standard in a room with
no working door lock. After asking the clown at the desk what had died in there, I left for more private pastures. Navigating through a sea of sweaty, snarling, tattooed, parolees (and that was just the women) I spotted The
Panda Palace.

Assuming this overpriced theme restaurant would not be a favorite of the current clientele, I ducked inside. The front door didn't have time to hit me in the ass before I was immediately greeted by a 400 pound female reincarnation of Buddha. "Pweeze shir, hugh need wait here for hostess" she said blocking my way with her ample girth. I tried to explain that I just needed to use the bathroom. "No, no, NO, must sit and you buy food here to use bafrhum, wait for hotess", she blurted in bwoken English. As I was turning to leave, this land orca was distracted by activity in the kitchen(an escaping cat perhaps), so I slipped by her and made a B-line to the back.

Having a choice between door #1 (the panda wearing pants) or door #2 (the panda wearing a dress) I went for the logical choice. Lunging at the handle I felt a painful tearing sensation in my rotator cuff as the dead bolt held firm. (I would later find out that this is one of very few things that actually work at Magic Mountain) I was about to try door #2 when a couple of twelve-year old girls from the short bus beat me to the punch. Leaving me no choice, I waited for the inconsiderate moron in possession of the water closet to stop choking his chicken (or whatever he was doing in there) and unlock the friggen door.

Suddenly, I was spotted by Shamoo-san, who was trotting in my direction grunting something. Feeling I was about to end up in the Szechwan beef, I made a few moves I learned in high school football and was able to zigzag around her without any further interaction. Once outside, and still experiencing the feeling of a bowling ball bouncing on my virgin sphincter, I decided to head for the nearest facility available to the general population of cretins. Most of the signage at Magic Mountain consists of some sort of primitive scribbling with magic markers. Feeling that I had just been let off a tour bus in the wrong section of Tijuana, I continued searching through the crowd and eventually spotted what I believed to be a sign indicating a men's room (it was clearly marked on the door as "East Side Boyz").

Entering rapidly, I headed for an empty stall avoiding any eye contact with any of the ten or so homeboys standing in front of the broken mirror. They didn't notice me, seeming to be preoccupied with slicking back their hair with industrial grease. This vile stuff was most likely pilfered from the bucket of lube they use on the roller coaster tracks. Then suddenly my faith in a supreme entity was restored when I found the door lock to work and only a few sprinkles of piss on the otherwise usable seat.

Grabbing a handful of Protectos (remember, first pull up, then jerk off) I sat down to relieve myself of last nights clam bake. I had been so focused on finding a sanctuary for my bulging bowels that I had failed to fully appreciate the wretched aroma. Thankfully, this was short lived as a new group of homeboys arrived and the smell of marijuana soon filled the room. Not only did this mask the smell of several tons of digested tacos left behind by the previous occupants, my eyeballs suddenly stopped bleeding. So, after a taking a few deep breaths, I was able to relax enough to give birth to a healthy five pound six ounce baby turd.

After a wipe down with some paper so thin they claim 250,000 sheets per rolls, my task was complete. That is until three hours later when I had to crap again.....



city=Newton Stewart, Galloway
country=Scotland
location=Car park next to Safeway supermarket
cleanliness=5
privacy=2
userfriendliness=4
overallscore=4
comments=Seems to have a team of full time attendants who take great pride in shining the metal bowls, and every other fitting. So clean I thought it had only just been opened. However the attendants did hover outside the stall, perhaps checking that I wasn't making work for them. Overall a superb toilet, and well worth a visit.

(From CQ Reader Matthew)


city=Disneyland
country=LA
location=Disneyland
cleanliness=1
privacy=0
userfriendliness=0
overallscore=1
comments=The only good thing I can say about crapping at Disneyland was at least they had paper in the stalls. Even though they vented the french fry exhaust into the room, it was still not enough to overcome the stench. However, I do suspect this did contribute to the sticky walls. A huge amount of trafic, little kids looking under the stall door, and the song It's a Small World playing in the background. I was unable to complete my task and gave serious thought to hopping off the Jungle Boat ride and finishing up behind a bush.


Lambda Chi Alpha Fraternity
Flint, MI USA uuummm, near a great lake?
User Friendliness = 2
Cleanliness = 2
Privacy = 3
Facilities = 3
Overall Rating = 2.5

I had the joy of using this toilet daily while I was visitng the guy who was my boyfriend at the time. The stalls themselves were clean but the fine and ecclectic magazine collection, ranging from popular mechanics to the most hard core porn mag you can imagine left something to be desired. The cold tile floor was a delightful wake up call on the 10 degree mornings. But I must admit they earned many bonus points by having a group shower with a glass door right next to the stalls...


city=Portland, ME.
country=U.S.A.
location=Double Tree Hotel
cleanliness=3
privacy=3
userfriendliness=4
overallscore=4
comments=Always warm seats!

 

Newbury Park (Ilford, UK)
city=Ilford
country=U.K.
location=Newbury Park
cleanliness=
privacy=
userfriendliness=
overallscore=
comments=

TMC Comments: Nice review. It is comforting just to know that they have toilets in Liford. Crazy Limeys.

city=Blackpool
country=England
location=Public Restrooms
cleanliness=0
privacy=1
userfriendliness=0
overallscore=1
comments=Awful toilets - Crap all over the seats and piss everywhere. Dark, dingy and smelly. I think it was rated the worst toilet in England on a TV show.


city=Ayelsbury
country=England, UK
location=Frias Sqaure
cleanliness=4
privacy=3
userfriendliness=5
overallscore=9
comments=Very good! u c the odd poop but thats want u wanna c, there are
holes in the stalls, but its cleaned every 45 minutes.


city=yateley
country=england
location=toilet at blackbushe market
cleanliness=0
privacy=0
userfriendliness=0
overallscore=0
comments=it was really hard 2 crap with so many people watching

 




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